Anyone who has studied economics knows about opportunity cost, or the unwritten cost of an activity based on a possible gain being foregone. I define the income I make as a stay-at-home-mother-and-wife as the opportunity cost of working outside the home.
Assuming a job requires 40 hours per week, with a 30 minute commute (that's short!) and $8/hour for daycare (an great rate for our neighborhood):
45 hours weekly * $8 hourly * 50 weeks per year (subtract for vacations) = $18,000
Food -- takeout and increased pre-processed groceries -- based on past experiences of being sick or otherwise incapacitated (and this doesn't account for increased long-term health care costs):
$300 monthly * 12 months = $3600
Additional dry cleaning -- of clothes that would otherwise need stain removal or hand-washing:
$30 monthly * 12 months = $360
Additional clothes purchases (I'm great at finding deals, but would account for some extra pieces in my wardrobe to look presentable at work):
$30 monthly * 12 months = $360
Additional metrocard expenses:
$104 (monthly pass) - $12 (monthly average as a SAHM) = $92 monthly = $1104 yearly
TOTAL: $23,424
Assuming, of course I am still as frugal as a working mother as I am staying home. It's not accounting for a cleaning service, laundering service, car, or a phone with a data plan.
And that's after-tax money too!
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Our CSA share
Breaking news from the Ima front:
We have just signed up for our very own CSA share!
Local, seasonal, and organic veggies & fruits delivered weekly. Pickup just a couple blocks away. Starting next week, duration 5 months.
Last summer I also thought about buying a share, but was held back by a few reservations -- the cost ($27 weekly), the possibility and hassle of a bug presence in organic produce, fear of consuming all the food before it rots.
But after a year of changing dietary habits -- aiming to serve increased fresh produce -- and enhanced bug-checking skills (and inspiration from organic-local-food propaganda like Animal, Vegetable, Miracle, a preachy yet enjoyable read...) -- we are ready to try.
I'm already brainstorming how this will change my life: juicy tomatoes, berries, smoothies, corn-on-the-cob. No more indecisiveness in the produce aisle. No more rationalizing about purchasing incredible summer produce when the root vegetables are still cheaper.
The first crops are delivered next week! I'll let you know how it goes.
We have just signed up for our very own CSA share!
Local, seasonal, and organic veggies & fruits delivered weekly. Pickup just a couple blocks away. Starting next week, duration 5 months.
Last summer I also thought about buying a share, but was held back by a few reservations -- the cost ($27 weekly), the possibility and hassle of a bug presence in organic produce, fear of consuming all the food before it rots.
But after a year of changing dietary habits -- aiming to serve increased fresh produce -- and enhanced bug-checking skills (and inspiration from organic-local-food propaganda like Animal, Vegetable, Miracle, a preachy yet enjoyable read...) -- we are ready to try.
I'm already brainstorming how this will change my life: juicy tomatoes, berries, smoothies, corn-on-the-cob. No more indecisiveness in the produce aisle. No more rationalizing about purchasing incredible summer produce when the root vegetables are still cheaper.
The first crops are delivered next week! I'll let you know how it goes.
Sunday, April 10, 2011
do-it-yourself preschool
Recently, DD has been attending daycare a few mornings a week. The best part -- aside from the much-needed quiet time it provides me, during which I can focus on work -- is that the active and loud environment provides such great stimulation that DD rarely complains of boredom for the remainder of the day!
This has become a problem, however, on days when she doesn't attend daycare. Being home with Ima, playing with toys on the living room floor, tagging along for chores and errands -- our old routine has recently become a recipe for a VERY CRANKY kid.
(In truth, this is probably not caused by daycare... I think starting daycare just corresponded well with that developmental stage where DD finally needs more than food and hugs to be happy! But I digress.)
Hence, I started wondering how to recreate a stimulating "pre-school" style environment on our own. It seems like a critical skill to learn... I never understood the phenomenon of sending children to pre-school at a young age to learn "socialization" or "reading readiness" -- to me, separation from one's young child is only undertaken in situations of necessity, like parental employment, and all "skills" of early education can be taught at home. (At least, that's what I think so far... you'll know if my opinion changes in a couple years.)
As far as I can tell, here are the components of DD's mornings at daycare:
1) free play -- lots of new toys, plenty of kids around
2) circle time -- read books and sing songs together
3) art time -- usually with finger paints or crayons, or challah dough braiding
4) snack time
I have some ideas for each of these categories, but I'd appreciate your comments too!
1) Free Play:
DD has 2 full toyboxes in our living room, and back in the olden era, she'd spend a few hours daily, on the floor surrounded by toys, with Ima as faithful playmate. Now, though, she seems much less interested in the toys. Maybe I should split them into a few smaller boxes and rotate each day, so said toys seem less familiar and thus more exciting?
We've also become regulars at the neighborhood playground, which is WONDERFUL. DD really likes to interact with the other kids, and also, of course, with the many toys they bring to the playground. (I don't usually bring toys, because I don't like sharing our stuff with random strangers... is that mean? Particularly when I take full advantage of other parents who share theirs?)
And of course, there's our weekly playgroup with 4 other mommy/toddler pairs in the neighborhood, when DD gets novel toys & social interaction while I get my sanity check for the week. I want to write more about that playgroup, but I'll save it for another post.
2) Circle Time
We have always read a few books daily, with concentrations before naptime and bedtime... there could be more, though, during periods of the day when DD is more awake. I've also wanted to work more books into our repertoire that involve active reading, involving identifying objects she knows on a page ("DD, can you point to the __?") and alphabet and number skills. We don't own any yet, but acquisition should be pretty simple (... "Grandma Grandpa? Bubbie Zaydie?")
In terms of singing, I should really start doing that. Until now DD mostly hears music when I'm humming to myself during household chores, but we don't really sing together, or sing songs with hand motions. I know enough kids' songs that this should be pretty easy -- maybe song time on the couch together, the same way we do books?
3) Art Time
Pre-daycare: nil.
Now: need to buy some art supplies. Maybe some chunky crayons. (We already have finger paints but they are SOOO messy!) Until I saw the projects she's been bringing home, I didn't realize the fine motor skills DD already possesses -- she can really scribble now!
I should also brainstorm for some different types of art projects. Never being an artistic person myself, I find this brainstorming pretty difficult, but there are a few resources I will check out (eg parshacakes.blogspot.com/ and www.parents.com/app/familyfunfinder and familyfun.go.com/crafts/crafts-by-age/toddler-crafts/)
4) Snack Time:
This is the one area where I think we've established a sufficient routine already. Three times daily, DD climbs into her high chair to eat alongside Ima and Abba.
The above routine will involve a lot of active participation on my part... it's going to be a hard transition, being that I'm so accustomed to "doing my own thing" at home while DD plays by herself or with a low level of parental involvement... but I've realized that playing by herself thing is just NOT working well anymore. Parenting is supposed to involve a heavy hiourly commitment, right?
I bet this routine would be a great framework within which to operate a "baby swap" (alternating with another mom to babysit the other's kid on a regular basis). Tried this for a couple weeks with one friend, but we run on such different schedules, so the attempt was short-lived. Maybe, once I get the preschool-like routine down, I will look for another!
This has become a problem, however, on days when she doesn't attend daycare. Being home with Ima, playing with toys on the living room floor, tagging along for chores and errands -- our old routine has recently become a recipe for a VERY CRANKY kid.
(In truth, this is probably not caused by daycare... I think starting daycare just corresponded well with that developmental stage where DD finally needs more than food and hugs to be happy! But I digress.)
Hence, I started wondering how to recreate a stimulating "pre-school" style environment on our own. It seems like a critical skill to learn... I never understood the phenomenon of sending children to pre-school at a young age to learn "socialization" or "reading readiness" -- to me, separation from one's young child is only undertaken in situations of necessity, like parental employment, and all "skills" of early education can be taught at home. (At least, that's what I think so far... you'll know if my opinion changes in a couple years.)
As far as I can tell, here are the components of DD's mornings at daycare:
1) free play -- lots of new toys, plenty of kids around
2) circle time -- read books and sing songs together
3) art time -- usually with finger paints or crayons, or challah dough braiding
4) snack time
I have some ideas for each of these categories, but I'd appreciate your comments too!
1) Free Play:
DD has 2 full toyboxes in our living room, and back in the olden era, she'd spend a few hours daily, on the floor surrounded by toys, with Ima as faithful playmate. Now, though, she seems much less interested in the toys. Maybe I should split them into a few smaller boxes and rotate each day, so said toys seem less familiar and thus more exciting?
We've also become regulars at the neighborhood playground, which is WONDERFUL. DD really likes to interact with the other kids, and also, of course, with the many toys they bring to the playground. (I don't usually bring toys, because I don't like sharing our stuff with random strangers... is that mean? Particularly when I take full advantage of other parents who share theirs?)
And of course, there's our weekly playgroup with 4 other mommy/toddler pairs in the neighborhood, when DD gets novel toys & social interaction while I get my sanity check for the week. I want to write more about that playgroup, but I'll save it for another post.
2) Circle Time
We have always read a few books daily, with concentrations before naptime and bedtime... there could be more, though, during periods of the day when DD is more awake. I've also wanted to work more books into our repertoire that involve active reading, involving identifying objects she knows on a page ("DD, can you point to the __?") and alphabet and number skills. We don't own any yet, but acquisition should be pretty simple (... "Grandma Grandpa? Bubbie Zaydie?")
In terms of singing, I should really start doing that. Until now DD mostly hears music when I'm humming to myself during household chores, but we don't really sing together, or sing songs with hand motions. I know enough kids' songs that this should be pretty easy -- maybe song time on the couch together, the same way we do books?
3) Art Time
Pre-daycare: nil.
Now: need to buy some art supplies. Maybe some chunky crayons. (We already have finger paints but they are SOOO messy!) Until I saw the projects she's been bringing home, I didn't realize the fine motor skills DD already possesses -- she can really scribble now!
I should also brainstorm for some different types of art projects. Never being an artistic person myself, I find this brainstorming pretty difficult, but there are a few resources I will check out (eg parshacakes.blogspot.com/ and www.parents.com/app/familyfunfinder and familyfun.go.com/crafts/crafts-by-age/toddler-crafts/)
4) Snack Time:
This is the one area where I think we've established a sufficient routine already. Three times daily, DD climbs into her high chair to eat alongside Ima and Abba.
The above routine will involve a lot of active participation on my part... it's going to be a hard transition, being that I'm so accustomed to "doing my own thing" at home while DD plays by herself or with a low level of parental involvement... but I've realized that playing by herself thing is just NOT working well anymore. Parenting is supposed to involve a heavy hiourly commitment, right?
I bet this routine would be a great framework within which to operate a "baby swap" (alternating with another mom to babysit the other's kid on a regular basis). Tried this for a couple weeks with one friend, but we run on such different schedules, so the attempt was short-lived. Maybe, once I get the preschool-like routine down, I will look for another!
Monday, March 28, 2011
Shoes and spoiling
A few weeks ago, when my dear toddler finally began toddling, I decided it was time to buy her some shoes. We headed a few blocks away to The Children's Place and found a cute, discounted, gender-neutral pair of sneakers. DD was a little wobbly walking in them, but that seemed normal -- after all, with decades of walking experience in my own life, I still feel most comfortable maneuvering barefoot. Some practice on the sidewalk is helping her gain confidence but she still does much better holding my hand for balance (which, frankly, is ideal anyway, considering that we live on a busy city street...).But I never send DD to daycare in her shoes -- just socks. The facility is entirely indoors and shoes don't seem necessary. Besides, as stated above, she's much more stable without them. But daycare provider noticed the missing shoes, so I showed her DD's sneakers and explained my reasoning. She nodded along knowingly when I mentioned that DD has trouble walking in them, but instead of accepting my rationalization, suggested aloud:
"You know, these don't look like such a good first pair of shoes. The bottoms are very stiff and are obviously difficult for anyone to walk in. You should buy a pair of soft-soled shoes" (presumably something like the Robeez shoes we've seen friends wearing).
She repeated the suggested a week later, when DD arrived for another day of daycare in socks, and I half-lied and said that because DD had developed a phobia of her shoes, we weren't rushing to buy more. (Truth: she had exhibited full-blown terror for about a day, after her first shoe-clad playground visit. Terror thankfully subsided rapidly.)
But in reality, my issue is -- we're not planning to buy another pair of size 7 shoes. I'm content knowing that I'll choose a more appropriate size 8 when that time comes (as long as it's also on the clearance rack!). In the meanwhile, DD has shot through her infant and toddler wardrobes at lightning speed, and I'm in no mood to spend money on another item that will be obsolete within weeks. Also, if I don't buy new shoes, DD won't notice!! There are some physical necessities for which she'll complain loudly (food, diaper, her stuffed dog...) but this is not one. And why get in a habit of spoiling her, insisting that objects like soft-soled shoes are a "necessity", when their absence won't ever be noticed?
In truth, the shoes conversation didn't bother me that much... it was just the most recent in a string of similar conversations, and got me thinking. I get very defensive about my lack of buying "things" for my daughter -- people in our community, and possibly our society at large, tend to buy far more objects for their kids than we do. But we aim to live our lives in a frugal, meted manner and want to impart those values to our children. At this stage of her life, my daughter needs attention, affection, food, shelter... and not much else! Even in her playroom (/ bedroom / our living / dining room) which is full of second-hand toys and books, she prefers to play active games with her caretaker 95% of the time. And regardless of the type of protection on her feet, she indiscriminately loves toddling down the sidewalk, looking for dogs...
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Cat or Dog?
DD's current favorite game is sitting in front of our 6th-floor window, watching the street below, waiting for dogs to walk by with their owners. When she sees a dog -- yes, her visual acuity is remarkable, and she even recognizes the tiny ones -- she erupts in shouts of "GOG!! GOG!! GOG!!"
We were at my parents' last week, the first time in a few weeks, and definitely the first time since the above game was created.
DD got a glimpse of their cat scamper across the room and within seconds...
"GOG!! GOG!! GOG!!"
We explained that, while this animal is also furry and walks on 4 legs, it's called a "CAT", to which she repeated "kahhh, kahhh". But a few hours later I asked DD, "What animal did we see at Grandpa's house? Cat or dog?", to which she responded enthusiastically, "GOG!".
We were at my parents' last week, the first time in a few weeks, and definitely the first time since the above game was created.
DD got a glimpse of their cat scamper across the room and within seconds...
"GOG!! GOG!! GOG!!"
We explained that, while this animal is also furry and walks on 4 legs, it's called a "CAT", to which she repeated "kahhh, kahhh". But a few hours later I asked DD, "What animal did we see at Grandpa's house? Cat or dog?", to which she responded enthusiastically, "GOG!".
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Lentil Soup
It's incredible that this mouth-watering dish is also so healthy.
Sautee onions, carrots, celery, and garlic. Add dried lentils and a bunch of basil and cover with water. (It seems to work regardless of exact amounts.) Simmer in a pressure cooker for 30 minutes.
Even DD ate lentil soup tonight!! (Does this mean her sore throat is gone, or just that the dish is amazing?)
Sautee onions, carrots, celery, and garlic. Add dried lentils and a bunch of basil and cover with water. (It seems to work regardless of exact amounts.) Simmer in a pressure cooker for 30 minutes.
Even DD ate lentil soup tonight!! (Does this mean her sore throat is gone, or just that the dish is amazing?)
Welcome
Everyone seems to have a blog nowadays, so I decided to be proactive and author one myself.
It's not like my life lacks blog-worthy content. After all, I have a one-year-old -- our professional mayhem maker -- whose escapades, and my concurrent ruminations, could fill volumes. I'm also on a conquest to become an expert healthy/lazy/budget-friendly chef. And experimenting with working from home as a freelance web programmer.
Also, I have these grand visions that, with a blog, I'll have a good answer for all those people who ask, "So what do you do all day?" -- "I blog. Come, check it out." Sounds much more comprehensible than "I chase my toddler while overseeing dinner, lunch, and yogurt and writing PHP."
It's not like my life lacks blog-worthy content. After all, I have a one-year-old -- our professional mayhem maker -- whose escapades, and my concurrent ruminations, could fill volumes. I'm also on a conquest to become an expert healthy/lazy/budget-friendly chef. And experimenting with working from home as a freelance web programmer.
Also, I have these grand visions that, with a blog, I'll have a good answer for all those people who ask, "So what do you do all day?" -- "I blog. Come, check it out." Sounds much more comprehensible than "I chase my toddler while overseeing dinner, lunch, and yogurt and writing PHP."
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